Sheldon, I'm warning you, I can play this game, too.
Sheldon我警告你,我可以陪你玩到底
If it's like your 3D chess game, then you're out of your length, width and depth.
如果跟立体象棋一个情况那你肯定输得一塌糊涂
Amy, get the Neosporin,somebody just got burned.
Amy把药膏拿来有人小心脏的烧伤了
All right, I tried."All right, I tried."
好吧,你等着。"好吧,你等着"
That should be the title of your autobiography.
这可以当你自传的书名了
Ooh, a seconddegree burn.
哇,二级烧伤
I've got the Neosporin.Who got hurt?
药膏来了。谁烧伤了?
It's a good thing you're cute.
要不是你长得好看,我真受不了你
So, I was reading how it's a good idea for new parents to take an infant CPR class.
我最近在书上看到,初为父母的人上一下婴儿心肺复苏的课还不错
Yeah, we've been meaning to do that.
是啊,我们有这么打算
Oh, I know a CPR instructor who'll come to the house.
我认识一个教心肺复苏的导师,可以上门教学
That'd be great. I'll give him a call.
那太好了,那我打个电话给他
We met when I was sleeping on the beach and he thought I was dead.
当时我睡在沙滩上他以为我死了
Thank you again for cooking.
再次谢谢你做饭
It's getting tough for me to be on my feet all day.
我现在越来越没办法长时间站着了
You just kick back and relax; I've got it all under control.
你只管好好休息放松,一切尽在我的掌控之中
Although it was already under control.
一切本来就在掌控之中
I'm sorry, you mumbled something?
不好意思,你在嘟囔什么?
It's just that they've had plenty of help.
我只是想说他们已经够人手了
Well, you know what they say... it takes a village.
人们说...养一个孩子要举全村之力
Well, they already had a village.
他们有我就等于有了全村之力了
I noticed the village couldn't find time to put the crib together.
我注意到这个全村之力连个婴儿床都没空装
Yeah, well, maybe the village was too busy checking out the local Montessori school for the new arrival.
可能因为这位全村之力正忙着查当地蒙台梭利儿童学校的招新消息
You mean the one with the empty beer bottles in the sandbox?
你是指那个整天玩空瓶子玩沙盒的学校吗?
We'll pass, thank you. Do something, Batman.
不考虑,谢谢。想点办法啊,蝙蝠侠
Hey.What do you think you're doing?
嘿!你这是在干嘛?
Separating my delicates.This is the level you're stooping to.No.
衣服分类,好洗衣服。所以你准备贱到这种程度了,才不
This is the level I am stooping to.
这才是我贱的程度
I believe that is flag to crotch for, checkmate.
旗帜估计就是用来遮羞的吧,将死你
Easypeasy, ooh, so breezy.
小菜一碟,裆部微风阵阵啊
Hey, what's up?
嘿,怎么了?
I'm here to put the crib together.
我来装婴儿床
Ooh, sorry, I already did it.
不好意思,我已经装好了
Oh, I don't know if you realize this, but I bought that crib.
你知不知道,是我买的婴儿床
Oh, yeah, I read about that on WhoGivesACrap.com
我知道,我在,"关我屁事"网上看到了
Why are you being like this?
你这个人怎么这样?
Because I love Howard and Bernadette
因为我爱Howard和Bernadette
and if I want to keep mooching off them, I need to be helpful.
如果我继续赖着他们,我必须帮上忙
Hey, this pregnancy had an emotionallyneedy third wheel way before you came along.
他们已经有我这个情感空虚的第三方了早在你出现之前就有了
Why can't there be four wheels?
为什么不能有第四方?
Is this what you do when I'm not here,make really good points?
我不在这的时候你是不是光想着这些好主意?
Look...Look, just come in and help me build a baby swing.
听...听着,进来吧,帮我装摇篮
Thank you.If you're hungry you can eat your takeout; nobody touched it.
谢谢。饿了的话,可以把你的外卖吃了,没吃那玩意
I think I'm gonna go for a run.You want to come?
我想去跑个步。一起吗?
No, last time that old lady in the park kept screaming, "Watch out, he's right behind you."
不了,上次公园里那个老太太一直喊"小心点,有个变态总跟着你"
Hello? Hey, how you doing?
你好?嘿,你们好吗?
Uh, can I help you?
你需要什么帮助吗?
I don't think so, but you're sweet for asking.
不用,不过还是谢谢你这么贴心
What... What are you doing in our apartment?
你...在我们的公寓里干嘛呢?
Oh, I rented a room from your neighbor, the tall guy...dressed like a little boy.
我从你的邻居那里租了个房间,就是那个高个子...穿得像小学生一样的那个
Unbelievable.Okay, uh, I don't know what he told you,but you can't stay here.
难以置信。好吧,我不知道他跟你说了什么但你不能住在这里
So, there are fresh linens on the bed and...
床上用品我已经换好了...
Well, now, I see you've met Theodore.
看来你们已经见到Theodore了
Theodore, these are your new roommates, Leonard and Penny.
Theodore这是你的新室友Leonard和Penny
They're very honest, but I would not leave cash lying around.
他们很老实但有钱还是不要随便乱放
Sheldon,what do you think you're doing?
嘿,Sheldon你在做什么?
My room is paid up until the end of the month,so I can do with it whatever I please, which includes renting it out for a dollar a night.
我的房租这个月底才到期所以我想怎么处置就怎么处置包括一晚一美元贱租
It's like the '40s again.
就像回到了40年代
Anyway, I'll leave you be.I have to... oh, oh!
我就不打搅你们了。我还要去...噢!
He's expecting a newspaper in the morning.
他还订了早报
Apparently, they still make them.
显然,报纸居然还在生产
All right, Sheldon, this is over the line.
够了,Sheldon你做得太过分了
That's true, but had I done something under the line, there wouldn't be a man in your kitchen who can't produce a single form of ID.
没错,但如果我做事规规矩矩的话现在你们的厨房里就不会有一个连身份证号都报不出来的人了
Oh, oh, I have a receipt from a blood bank.
我可是有血库的回执单的
I'm Onegative.And now you know as much about him as I do.
我是阴性O型血。现在我们对这个人的了解一样多了
Oh, hey, Bernadette,the swing comes with two different mobiles.
嘿,Bernadette悬挂玩具到了,有两种坠饰
The giraffes are pretty cute, what do you think?
长颈鹿的那个很可爱,你觉得呢?
Great, go with the giraffes.
好吧,那就长颈鹿的吧
Although...the high contrast of zebra stripes might provide better stimulus for a developing baby.
然而...斑马身上高对比度的条纹能给宝宝的生长带来良性刺激哦
Yeah, you're probably right, go with the zebras.Good choice, boss.
你说的没错,那就斑马的吧。明智的选择,老大
At least my nose is naturally brown.
至少我的马屁味是家乡带来的
Hey, could you please go to the market for me?
你能帮我去买点东西吗?
Get Stuart or Raj to do it.
让Stuart或者Raj去不就行了
Howie, they've been doing everything for you.
Howie他们把你该做的事都做完了
Mm, I know.It's really making me lose respect for both of them.
嗯,我知道啊。我真有点看不起他们呢
Please just go to the store. Fine.
你就不能去趟商店吗。好吧
Who wants to drive me to the store? Me! I'll do it!
你们谁想开车送我去商店啊?我!我送你!
Take Raj. Stuart is supposed to paint my toenails.
让Raj去吧。Stuart还要帮我涂脚趾甲油呢
What do you think?
你怎么看?
Should we go to a hotel?
要不我们去旅馆吧?
And just leave him here alone?
然后把他一个人留在这里吗?
Okay, I'll go to a hotel.
好吧,那我自己去
Text me in the morning if you're still alive.
如果明早你还活着的话,就给我发个短信
Uh, Theodore, how long are you planning to stay exactly?
额,Theodore你打算在这里住多久呢?
Oh, thanks to the coins I found in your couch, a day longer than I thought.
多亏了我在你们沙发里找到的硬币又能多住一天了
This is ridiculous.I like the painting.
太荒谬了,我喜欢那幅画
Is that your mom? Sheldon, get out here! Will you keep it down?
旁边那个是你妈妈吗?Sheldon滚出来!你能小声点吗?
What kind of vengeful bed and breakfast do you think I'm running?
要不然我的住宿加早餐生意还怎么开张?
We lived together 13 years.
我们住在一起十三年了
How can you be so awful to me?
你怎么能这么对我?
I'm being awful?!
我怎么对你了?
You're the one who went out of your way to hurt me.
你才是那个先做得过份,伤了我的心的人
Because you were being selfish.
因为你太自私了
Dividing our belongings is difficult.
要分清我们的所有物是很难的
Why? I said I didn't care! Excuse me.
为什么?我说了我不在乎!打断一下
It's none of my business, but it sounds like a lot of this anger is coming from love.
虽然这和我无关,但听上去你们生气都是因为爱啊
Yeah, thanks, but nobody asked you.
谢谢你多管闲事,但没人问你意见
Well, I'm just gonna keep on talking.
那我也还是要说
Seems like, with moving out, you're in a new phase of your lives and it's easier
Sheldon现在的情况似乎是Sheldon搬出去以后,你们的生活变得不一样了比起坦然面对
to fight than to face the feelings that you have for one another.
你们彼此对这种新变化的感受吵架要来得容易多了
I think he might be right.
我想他说的没错
Also, who is that?
还有,他是什么人?
I have to admit, leaving you to move in with Amy has been harder than I thought it would be.
我必须承认从你那搬出来和Amy住没有我想像中那么容易
Well, for me, too.
我也这么觉得
It's not the same with you gone.
你走了以后确实不一样了
If you're looking for a new guy to live with...
如果你想换一个人陪你住的话...
No! We're good. Thank you.
不用!现在这样挺好的,谢了
So, no one's gonna tell me? Okay.
没人想告诉我?好吧
Leonard, I would like us to stop fighting about our possessions.
Leonard啊我不想因为什么东西该归谁再和你争来争去了
Well, I'd like that, too.
我也希望如此
In fact, I want you to keep the apartment flag,and I'm not just saying that because it touched your genitals.
事实上,我希望你能收下我们的公寓旗我不是因为它和你的生殖器接触了才这么说的
You promise? I do.
你保证?我保证
And to show you that there are no hard feelings,I am willing to rub my genitals on it as well.
为了证明我的真心实意我愿意用这面旗也来摩擦我的生殖器
Well... if we're rubbing genitals on things, that's where I shine.
这个嘛...如果你们要拿什么摩擦生殖器的话,大家朝我看过来
Little lower to the left.A little more.
左边再低一点。再低一点
Is it good? No, still hideous.
可以了吗?没,还是丑得惊天动地
Well, I'm sure at some point,we won't even notice it's there.
我觉得一段时间以后,我们就会无视它了
Yeah, you'd think that,but after a while it starts showing up in your dreams.
你是这么觉得的但一段时间以后你就会梦见这幅画
I think it brings the room together.
我觉得这幅画和这间屋子很搭啊
Hey, tomorrow who wants to paint the nursery?
明天谁想刷一下婴儿房啊?
I'll do it. Why do you get to do it? I'm the artist.
我来吧。为什么让你去刷婴儿房?我才是艺术家
Just because you're starving doesn't make you an artist.
为生活所迫去卖漫画不代表你就是艺术家
Just because I look sickly doesn't mean I'm starving.
看上去病态不代表我就为生活所迫
Howard! Guys, you heard her, go see what she wants.
喂,Howard!你们听到了吧,去看看她要干嘛
I think I'm in labor.
我觉得我要生了
Oh, oh, okay. Okay, uh, uh, uh, I can do this.
噢,好吧。好吧,我行的
We have a plan.
我们做过准备的
Somebody please tell me the plan.
快说说我们的准备是什么啊
I'll get the hospital bag. I'll pull the van up.
我去拿陪产包,我去发动车子
Meet you outside in 2 minutes.
两分钟后在门外碰面
Team Baby, go! I love you.
生娃队,冲啊!我爱你
I love you, too.Are we hugging or having a baby? Let's go!
我也爱你。我们是要抱抱还是要宝宝啊,快出发!