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Item 28: your pet name for me.
第二十八项议程:你对我的昵称
Time's running out on this. You need to make a decision.
时间不多了，是时候做个决定
I submitted you a notarized list.
我递交了一份公证名单
I'm sorry, but "Gollum"and "Flakey"are not acceptable.
原谅我，"咕噜"(《魔戒》中的咕噜)和"疯癫"想都别想
Well, you don't like "Princess Corncob" you don't like "Fester"-- you're just impossible to please.
那你也不喜欢"玉米公主"，"脓疮"也不行，真是难伺候
We'll come back to that one.
这事我们再议
This brings us to the final item in our annual State of the Relationship Summit.
现在进入"恋爱关系峰会"的最后一项议程
Item 29: Valentine's Day.
第二十九项:情人节
Ah, the worst for last. Hmm.
啊，压轴的都是上不了台面的
Classic Flakey.
经典的"疯癫"风格
Before you get upset, I believe I've come up with a way for us to celebrate the occasion that we both can enjoy.
先别沮丧，我认为我的提案可以让我们双方在情人节里自得其乐
People usually start a meeting with a joke, but you go ahead-- end with one.
笑话通常用在会议开场白里，但你用在结尾，说来听听
I propose we spend a weekend at a bed-and-breakfast in Napa Valley.
我提议我们去纳帕谷，在提供早餐的旅馆度过周末
I hate every word in that sentence.
字字穿心
Including "in"" "at," "we" and "a""
包括"去" "找" "在" "我们"还有，"的"
Come on, Sheldon. Why not?
来吧，谢尔顿，何乐而不为?
For starters, a bed-and-breakfast forces you to eat with strangers at your table.
首先，在小旅馆里你不得不和陌生人同餐桌共进早餐
One step ahead of you--Bernadette and Wolowitz are going with us.
这我早就想到了--伯纳黛特和沃洛维茨会和我们同行
Oh, very well. What are the sleeping arrangements?
哦，尽管如此，房间怎么安排?
We've only been dating for three years.
我们才交往三年
If we were to share a room, people might talk.
如果住一间房，会惹别人闲话的
I got you your own room.
我帮你订了单间
What if my room has a claw-foot bathtub? It doesn't. I know it makes you feel like you're bathing inside a monster.
如果我的房间有猫脚浴缸怎么办?绝对没有，我知道猫脚浴缸会让你觉得在怪兽肚子里沐浴
Look, I appreciate the effort, but I'm still unclear how this trip is supposed to be enjoyable for me.
听着，你的努力我看在眼里，但我并不觉得这样的旅途会让我乐在其中
We're going to have Valentine's Day dinner on a fully functioning vintage train. Vintage?
我们会在一辆运转的复古火车上享受情人节晚餐。复古款?
Be specific.
愿闻其祥
An Alcoa FA-4 diesel locomotive leading a train of meticulously restored 1915 Pullman first-class coaches.
美国铝业公司的FA-4柴油火车头连接着一辆精心修复拥有头等车厢的1915年铂尔曼列车。
Wow. I'm feeling the urge to hug you.
哇哦，现在真想抱你一下
And one... and two... All right, Gollum, we're good.
一...二...好了，咕噜，欲火已灭
Are you sure you guys don't want to come with us to Napa? You could probably still get a room.
你们真不和我们一起去纳帕谷?估计现在还能订到房间
No, I think we're just gonna have a quiet weekend at home.
不了，我们想在家安静地过周末
Plus, I'm not sure it's a great idea to take Penny to where wine comes from.
而且，我不觉得带佩妮去红酒之乡会是个好主意
What? It's a joke.
干嘛?笑话而已啦
Oh, come on. We bust on each other. I wear dorky glasses, you might have a problem it's all for laughs.
拜托，我们不就是这样挤兑彼此么，我戴着呆瓜眼镜，你自身有些缺陷...一笑了之咯
That would really piss me off if I didn't have a buzz going on.
要是我还清醒绝对饶不了你
Howard, which pocket watch will you be wearing Howard for dinner on the train?
你准备要戴哪个怀表去那个火车上吃晚餐?
I'm sorry, what?
不好意思，你说什么?
Oh, I'm afraid if we wear the same pocket watch, it will be embarrassing.
哦，我就是担心我们俩撞怀表，那得多尴尬
I don't own a pocket watch.
我压根没怀表
Oh, my. Well, then my apologies for bringing up this sore spot.
多新鲜。失礼了，不该哪壶不开提哪壶
Since you two are gonna be around for Valentine's, would you mind watching Cinnamon?
既然你们情人节都在能帮忙照看一下小肉桂么?
You have Valentine's plans?!
你情人节居然有约?!
Which came out sounding way more surprised than I meant.
语气可能过于惊讶了呢
L-Let me try that again. You have Val... See? I can't do it.
我再试一次，你丫情人节...看?我藏不住
I don't have plans which is why I booked time on the big telescope that night.
我之所以在情人节晚上预定了天文望远镜正是因为我那天清闲
Well, an evening looking at the stars--that's still kind of romantic. Except I'll be alone.
夜晚独自仰望星空...还是挺浪漫的。却是形单影只。
I'm trying to put lipstick on a pig here. Work with me.
我在尝试着帮你把故事情节美化，合作点儿
We'd be happy to watch Cinnamon. Yeah.
我们乐意帮你照看肉桂，是的
Thank you. Oh, and I'd like for at least one of us to see some action, so if you guys happen to have sex, it's cool if she stays in the room.
谢谢，对了，我倒是希望我和肉桂至少有一个可以欣赏点儿动作场面，如果你俩刚好要滚床单，把她留在房间里也不成问题
Hey, same goes for the two of you with Amy.
嘿，这情景也适用于你俩和艾米
What do you think, Sheldon?
谢尔顿，你觉得怎样?
It's magnificent.
高端大气上档次
This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever. I'm so glad you like it.
这会是史上最棒的情人节。很高兴你喜欢
I'm prepared to say I love it, as soon as I confirm there are no hobos aboard.
只要我确定列车上没有无业游民我对它的爱便是完整的
Okay. Raj, I got it. Bye.
知道了，拉杰，我明白。再见
That was your daddy.
那是你老爸哟
He wanted me to say that he misses... Why am I doing this?
他想说他想念... 我为什么要这样?
Happy Valentine's Day! Ooh, flowers and chocolates? Somebody's trying to get me out of my panties.
情人节快乐!哦，鲜花和巧克力?某人想要干坏事咯
Don't be surprised if you find five chocolates missing and three gross coconut ones with a bite taken out.
要是你发现少了5颗巧克力，还有三个上面有咬痕的椰子味被我扔了
It came that way when I bought it.
我买来就成这样了
Got you a little something, too. Aw. Jewelry. Oh, my God. Lakers tickets?!
我也给你准备了小礼物哦。真贴心，首饰啊，哦，我的天哪，湖人队的票?!
It gets better. Instead of me, you can take someone who will actually enjoy it.
更妙的是，不用与我同去，你可以带上真心喜欢看的人
You are the best boyfriend ever.
你真是男朋友中的战斗机
Thank you. Seriously, please don't make me go.
谢谢夸奖，说真的，请别逼我去
Should we take this little party to the bedroom?
我们去卧室里庆祝庆祝呗?
Mm, don't have to-- we have the whole place to ourselves. Oh, that's true. In fact, if you want, we can do it right here on Sheldon's spot.
不用啊，整个房子都是我们的战场，说的也是，只要你愿意，我们可以在谢尔顿专座上解决
That is the least sexy thing anyone's ever said to me.
这是我听过的最没性致的话
To the bedroom! Yeah!
向卧室进军!冲啊！
And for the entree, tonight's special is a seafood risotto.
主菜的话，今晚特色菜是海鲜调味饭
Do you have any questions? Uh, I do.
还有疑问吗?我有
Uh, does this train car have the original link-and-pin coupler or the Miller Hook and Platform?
请问这辆火车采用了最初的链式车钩，还是米勒平面车钩呢?
I'm sorry, I meant questions about the food.
抱歉，我指的是和食物有关的问题
Oh, of course. Um...
噢，明白，嗯...
Is the seafood risotto being served on a train car with the original link-and-pin coupler or the Miller Hook and Platform?
海鲜调味饭将出现在配有原装链式车钩的火车餐桌上，还是在装有有米勒平面车钩的火车餐桌上呢?
I-I think we're gonna need a minute.
给我们点时间
Fun fact: it's neither.
有趣的是，这辆车两个都没用
They actually use the AAR type E coupler.
他们使用了美国铁道协会E类车钩
If you listen carefully when the locomotive disconnects, you'll hear the characteristic click-pshht-thunk of the knuckle.
如果你在车头分离的时候仔细听车钩标志性响声的咔哒噗嗤铛不绝于耳
Get out of town.
哥们儿内行啊
Fun fact: I'm gonna jump off this train.
有趣的是，我想跳车了断这一切
Hey, Cinnamon, guess who just did it human style.
你好啊，小肉桂，猜猜谁刚才用人类的方式爱爱啦
Oh, my God! It's a little late, but I'll take it.
哦，我的妈呀!这高潮虽然来的有点晚，不过哥还是接受了
No, Cinnamon ate the chocolates. That's really bad for dogs.
不是啊，小肉桂这货把巧克力吃光了，这对狗狗非常不健康
Oh, crap. What are we gonna do? We gotta get her to a vet right now. I don't have a vet.
噢，该死，我们该怎么办?我们得立刻把她送到兽医那去，可我没有兽医啊
I have a podiatrist, an optometrist, an allergist, a dermatologist, a urologist. You'd think I'd have a vet.
我有足科医生，眼科医生，过敏症医师，皮肤科医生和泌尿科医生，你就觉得我有兽医
Okay. There's one not far from here. Come on. Let's go. Okay. Koothrappali was right.
好吧，有一家离这不远，我们走，好吧，库斯拉帕里说得对
We should have let her watch.
我们真该让她围观的
Do another one, do another one! Okay.
再来一个，再来一个!没问题
Here's my impression of the Amtrak Acela barreling down the Eastern Corridor.
这是我对美国铁路公司的阿西乐特快飞驶过东区走廊的印象
It's like there's a train in your mouth.
你的嘴里好像住着一列火车。
Oh, yeah. I've got one. Um, the Amtrak Wolverine coming into Chicago.
噢，对了，我想到一个，美国铁路公司金刚狼特快驶向芝加哥时的声音
I've been on that train.
我曾坐过那辆火车
And I just was again.
刚才有身临其境之感
Hey, see if you guys can guess this one. Bang! Splat! Thud.
看看你们能不能猜对这个，砰!啪嗒!砰
How many trains have you been on?
你迄今为止坐过多少种火车?
Tons. A box fell on my head at UPS six years ago.
不计其数，六年前我在UPS工作时被盒子砸伤头部
Now I just collect disability and ride trains.
现在我就只领残疾救济金和坐火车
Wow. Your life's amazing. Not always.
哇哦，你的生活真是多姿多彩。也不尽然
A box fell on my head at UPS six years ago.
六年前我在UPS工作时被盒子砸伤头部
Now I just collect disability and ride trains.
现在我就只领残疾救济金和坐火车
Why do I even try?
我何必要挣扎呢?
I'm gonna fix this right now.
我马上解决
Okay. Just make it look like an accident.
去吧，别闹得鸡飞狗跳哈
Excuse me. You are at Valentine's dinner with your girlfriend.
打扰一下，你可正和女友享受情人节晚餐呢
Now get back over there and be with her. You're right.
现在赶紧回到她身边。言之有理
That was insensitive of me.
恕我后知后觉
I have to go back to my table now.
我得回我那桌了
You should join us. All right.
你应该加入我们。何尝不可
Great. Now there's two of 'em.
好极了，现在有两朵奇葩共放
How much chocolate did she eat?
她吃了多少巧克力?
A whole box. Well, to be fair, you ate a lot of it before you gave it to me.
一整盒，说句公道话，送我之前你已经消灭不少
So the point is I may have saved her life.
说不定是我还救了她一命呢
I'm sorry, is this a joke to you? No.
抱歉，你觉得这很好笑吗?没有
Maybe to her.
也许对她来说是
How big a box of chocolate was it?
到底是多大一盒巧克力?
Uh, something like this. I don't know. It came free with a full tank of gas.
大概这么大，我也不确定，那是加满油后的赠品
Really? Do you know how much those Lakers tickets were? Do you know how much gas is? Hey! Sorry. Sorry.
坑爹呢?你知道那些湖人队票多少钱吗?你知道我加了多少汽油吗?你俩打住!抱歉，对不起
Oh, my God, Cinnamon, are you okay?!
噢，我的心肝脾肺肾，小肉桂，你还好吗?！
I can't believe you two!
真不敢相信你这对混蛋!
You do whatever it takes to save her life. If she needs new organs, I'll buy any dog necessary and scrap them for parts!
请你不惜一切代价救活她，如果她需要新的器官，什么狗的我都愿意买，然后把它们肢解了!
