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Ok. Here's his diaper bag, and his uh, Mr. Winky, and uh...oh, him. Hi!
这是他放尿不湿的袋子…跟他的眨眼先生。还有…他，嗨！
So how did everything go?
一切都还好吗？
Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but he started it.
好，都很好。我们有个喷射性…呕吐事件，不过是他先挑起来的。
Well, we've gotta go. Ok.
我们得走了哦。好。
...Oh, right. Um, I've got some news. It's about us.
咳咳...对了，我有个消息，是关于我们的。
Oh, you and me?
你跟我？
Uh, no, Susan and me.
不，苏珊跟我。
The other us.
另一个“我们”。
Ok.
好。
We're uh, we're getting married.
我们要结婚了。
As in, "I now pronounce you wife and wife" married?
就像“我现在宣布，你们成为妻子跟妻子”的“结婚”？
Anyway, we'd like you to come, but we totally understand if you don't want to.
我们非常欢迎你来，若你不想来，我们也完全了解。
Yeah. Well, why wouldn't I wanna come? I had fun at the first wedding.
我为什么会不想去呢？第一次跟你的婚礼上我玩儿的很开心。
Look, I just thought that...
只是我觉得也许因为我们…
No no no, I mean, hey, why shouldn't I be happy for you? You know? I mean, what would it say about me if I couldn't revel in your joy? I'm reveling baby, believe me!
不…我是说… 我为什么不该替你高兴呢？…如果我不能为你的快乐而快乐，那我算什么呢？我说的是真的，相信我！
Isis your finger caught in that chair?
你的手指被椅子夹住了吗？
Mmm hmmm.
嗯哼。
Want us to go?
想要我们离开吗？
Uhhuh.
嗯哼。
This is so cool. You're actually gonna be on television.
好酷耶，你真的要在电视上出现了。
I know. It really hit me last night. I'm gonna be on Days of Our Lives. And then I started thinking about all of us, and how these are the days of our lives. .
我知道，我昨晚才真正的意识到我要在“我们的日子”里面演出了。然后我开始想我们的事，我发现这正是“我们的日子”。
Yes!
哦耶！
What?
怎么了？
Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend, and she's in a full body cast.
帮卡萝跟苏珊办喜宴的人，这个周末骑登山车出了车祸…全身都上了石膏。
Yes!
哦耶！
They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
他们要我办喜宴，太酷了。我从来没有办过这个…而且我很需要钱，你没意见吧？
Would it matter?
这又不会改变什么？
Oh, you are so great! Thank you!
你太棒了！谢谢！
Are you really not going?
你真的不去吗？
I am really not going. I mean, I don't get it. They already live together, why do they need to get married?
我当然真的不去。我不懂她们已经住在一起了，为什么还需要结婚？
Because they love each other, and they wanna celebrate that love with the people that are close with them.
因为她们相爱啊。她们要跟她们亲密的人，一起庆祝那份爱。
If you wanna call that a reason.
如果你硬要说，那也算个理由的话。
Who's the bitterest man in the living room, the bitterest man in the living room? Hi, neighbor.
谁是客厅里最苦的人？客厅里最苦的男人？嗨，邻居。
Ross, I thought you were over this.
罗斯，我以为你不在意了。
Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my exwife. Ifif she were marrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
那跟这个没有关系，她是我前妻。要是嫁了一个男的话，你们不会希望我去。
Hey, if she were marrying a guy, she'd be like the worst lesbian ever.
她要是嫁了个男的话，她就成了史上最烂的同性恋了。
Did I miss it? Did I miss it?
我错过了吗？
No no, I'm on right after this guy shoots himself.
还没有，这个家伙自杀之后，我就上场了。
Whoa, she is pretty.
她很漂亮耶。
Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about, you know, how to work with the cameras, and smellthefart acting.
对了，她人也很好。她教我怎么样在镜头前演戏…还有“闻屁”演戏大法。
Huh. I'm sorry, what? Excuse me?
对不起？什么？
Smellthefart acting.
“闻屁”演戏大法。
It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one.
在短时间之内，要记那么多的台词…有时候你需要时间想下一句。
So while you're thinking of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this...
所以当你想台词的时候呢…你停顿一下，表情要看起来非常的凝重。像这样…
Ok...
哦，明白了...
Oh, here's my scene, there's my scene. "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
轮到我了，我的戏份来了，我的戏份来了。华莱士太太？我是德瑞克雷莫瑞医生，你妹妹的神经外科医师。
Yeah tell me, is she gonna be all right?
告诉我，她会不会好起来？
I'm afraid the situation is much dire than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a...
恐怕你妹妹的情形，比我们想像的还要糟糕。你妹妹得的病是…
A subcranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this further over coffee.
脑下血肿。或许我们可以，边喝咖啡边聊一下。
Nice!
演的不错嘛！
For a minute there I thought you were actually trying to smell something.
刚有那么一会儿，我还真以为，你闻到了什么东西呢。
That is so good! Do it again!
再演一次，演得太棒了！
All right, all right. "Damn it Braverman, it's right there on the chart!"
好吧好吧…“该死，贝弗曼，就在那张图表上”。
That's great. All right, I gotta get to work, I got a big dinosaur bone to inspect.
太棒了，好了，我要去上班了，我有根大恐龙骨头要检查。
No no. No, that's me.
不…那是我。
Oh, right.
哦对…是你。
Oh. Oh, thanks. I couldn't uh...
噢。谢了，我没办法…
Is everything ok?
你还好吧？
Um, no, huhuh. One of my clients died on the massage table today.
不，今天我有一个客人，死在按摩桌上。
Oh my God.
天啊。
That's a little more relaxed than you want 'em to get.
她是不是按你说的放松过头了。
Yeah, uhhuh. Um, she was, you know, 82 years old. And uh, Her name was um, Mrs. Adelman.
她已经八十二岁了…她叫爱德曼太太。
Oh, honey.
亲爱的。
Yeah, it's just so strange.
对呀，感觉怪怪的…
I mean, you know, she probably woke up this morning and thought, "All right, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, andand you know, then I'll have my massage."
她早上醒来时说不定在想…我去吃点早餐，然后去散步。然后，再去按摩。
Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it."
却不知道上帝在想“好，但是就到此为止了”。
Oh oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, um, I was cleansing her aura when it happened, and whenwhen her spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
最诡异的事情是…事情发生的时候，我正在清她的灵气。当她的灵魂离开身体的时候…我不认为它走远了。
What'd you mean?
什么意思啊？
II think it went into me.
我想它上了我的身。
God, this is so hard. I can't decide between lamb or duck.
这太难了，我没有办法决定做羊还是鸭肉。
Well, of course, lambs are scarier. Otherwise the movie would've been called Silence of the Ducks.
当然了，羊肉比较恐怖，不然那部电影（《沉默的羔羊》）就会改为“沉默的鸭子”了。
Ok, who ordered what?
好了，谁点了什么？
Oh, I believe I had the halfdrunk cappuccino with the lipstick on the rim.
我想我点了，喝了一半的上面还有唇印的卡布奇诺咖啡。
Yes, and this with the cigarette butt in it, is that decaf?
是吗，这杯有烟屁股的是无咖啡因的吗？
Oh God.
天哪。
I can't believe you're so uptight about your mom coming.
真不敢相信，你妈要来会把你紧张成这个样子。
I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, my life is total crap, you know?
我知道，只是这是她第一次来，我不想她觉得…因为我没嫁给贝瑞，我的生活就完全是垃圾。
Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedman tell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time. I'm sorry. At least you guys don't have to hear the stuff she says in my head.
说到垃圾，去听史黛拉尼德曼…一遍遍地讲她跟罗德斯泰格（影星）的故事。对不起，至少你们听不到她在我脑子里说的什么。
Uh, Pheebs, how long do you think this lady'll be with us?
菲比？你想她会跟我们在一起多久？
I don't know. I mean, she obviously has some kind of unfinished business. Sit up!
我不知道，老太太显然，还有什么心愿还没完成呢。坐有坐相！
There she is.
她在这里！
Mom! Sweetie!
妈妈！嘿，亲爱的！
So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
这就是你工作的地方啊！好棒啊！这是客厅？还是餐厅？谁看得出来？我猜乐趣就在这儿吧。
Pretty much. Here, meet my friends.
差不多啦，来，看看我的朋友。
Monica! You look gorgeous! Oh, my, the last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
莫妮卡，你看起来好美哟。上回我看到你的时候，不是在吃就是被吃的状态。
Uh, this is Joey, this is Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross.
这是乔伊，这是菲比，这是钱德，你记得罗斯吧？
Oh hello, Ross. Hi, Mrs. Green.
你好，罗斯。格林太太...
So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
你们认为我们家瑞秋系着围裙…做大事的样子如何？
Oh Mom!
妈妈！
Ok. If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
没有你来倒咖啡呢，大家都休想喝到东西了。
Believe me, sometimes that happens.
相信我，有时候真的会这样的。
This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
太令人兴奋了，我从来没有工作过。我从我爸家，直接到女学生联谊会之家…然后再到我先生的家，我真为你骄傲。
Oh, really?
真的啊？
Yes. Oh let's make a day of it. We'll have lunch, we'll shop, we'll get our nails done...whatever you want!
是的，让我把今天的行程计划一下。我们去吃饭、购物，做指甲，你想干什么我们就干什么！
Ok, mom, uh II have to work.
我还得工作呢妈妈。
What, no one else can pour coffee?
什么，没有别人可以倒咖啡吗？
I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course that's before she got the lousy facelift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
我知道你让我想起了谁了。艾沃琳·德莫。像去做大量的拉皮手术前的她，现在她像苏比·赛尔了。
Pheebs, who's Evelyn Dermer?
菲比，艾沃琳·德莫是谁？
I don't know. Who's Soupy Sales?
不知道，苏比·赛尔是谁啊？
Oh my God, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.
老天啊！有个丑陋裸男在拉大提琴。
Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument.
是啊，还好他不是在演奏一个比较小的乐器。
You have some life here, sweetie.
你在这儿可真有生活啊。
I know. And mom, I realize you and daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything.
我知道，妈，我知道你跟爸很不高兴我没有嫁给贝瑞，住在郊外的大房子，过着安逸的生活。
But, God this is just so much better for me, you know?
可是，这样对我好多了？
I do know. You didn't love Barry, honey. And I've never seen you this happy. I look at you and I think, oh, this is what I want.
我知道，你不爱贝瑞，亲爱的。我也没见过你这么快乐过。看着你，我心里在想…“这是我要的”。
For...me.
你这么说是为我吗？
Well, not just for you.
不只是为了你啦。
Well, what do you mean?
你是什么意思啊？
I'm uh, considering leaving your father.
我在考虑离开你爸爸。
All right. Tell me if this is too cute. Lesbian wedding, chicken breasts.
好，告诉我这是不是很可爱：女同婚礼…鸡胸肉。
Oh God. I think I'm gonna be sick.
天啊，我想我快吐了。
Why? It's not like I'm putting little nipples on them!
为什么？我又没有在上面放小乳头！
Oh, honey I am sorry. Please don't be mad at me. Whwhat can I do? Do you want me to make those little Marshmallow treats you used to like? I can call up Carnel and find out how.
亲爱的，很抱歉，请别生我的气。我能做点什么？你想让我做你喜欢的棉花糖吗？我可以给卡梅拉，（家里女佣）打电话问问她怎么做。
Mom, I just don't understand. I thought you were happy.
我不明白，我以为你一直很开心的。
Yeeeah. Well, so did I.Butbut you know how sometimes you're driving on the highway and you get home and you can't actually remember having driven there.
是的，我也这么以为。想象一下，很多次你在高速公路上开车回到家后，却不记得曾到过那里。
Uhhuh.
嗯哼。
That's kind of my life's been like.
那就是我的生活状态。
Uh, but couldn't you listen to the radio more?
那你开车时候不能多听听广播吗？
I wish it were that easy. But then I see you here and I keep thinking "Why can't I have this? I want adventures, I wanna hang out, I want Chandler!"
我也希望事情能这样简单，但是我看到了你在这儿过得这么好。我想，我为什么不能这样？我想冒险，我想出去玩，我也想要一个钱德勒！
Oh, No. Mom! Mom..., believe me Chandler is no reason to leave daddy! I mean....You think this looks like I am having a lot of fun but it's really hard, really hard.
妈妈，相信我，钱德勒决不是你要离开爸爸的原因！你以为我现在过的很有意思吗，但是这真的很艰难，很艰难。
I got this lousy job. I barely know if I am gonna make rent, and forget about buying stuff.
我有一个烂工作，我都不知道够不够支付房租，根本别想购物！
Oh honey, you don't understand. I'd be doing what you are doing...but with money. It's very different.
亲爱的，你不明白。我跟你的处境一样，只不过我有钱而已，这是完全不同的。
And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
你完全不知道他们处得不好？
None.
不知道。
They didn't fight a lot?
他们不常吵架？
No! They didn't even talk to each other. God, how was I supposed to know they were having problems?
不，他们连话都不讲了。天啊，他们不讲话我怎么会知道，他们之间有问题啊？
You know in my day, divorce was not an option.
在我那个时代，离婚不是个选择。
Hey, look who's up.
看谁醒了。
Oh, I just can't believe this is happening.
我只是无法相信这个事情嘛。
I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced, you know? I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
我是说我小时候，每个人的父母都在闹离婚。我只是想，我长大了，就不用再担心这个了。
Well is there any chance that you can look at this as flattering? I mean, she's doing it because she wants to be more like you.
你可不可以把这件事看做夸奖你呢？我是说，她这样做是想向你学习。
