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I never had a dog. Never wanted one. As an allergy kid, my only pet was a cricket, occupying a little bamboo cage a family friend had brought from Japan. My most memorable childhood encounter with a dog was a yappy mutt next door to my elementary school that chased me around the playground and bit my leg. I've been afraid of them ever since.
我从未养过狗，也不想养。我有过敏症，所以小时候唯一的宠物就是板球，它静静的躺在一位朋友从日本带回来的小竹笼中。童年时代，小学附近的一只小狗令我记忆颇深。它经常在操场上追着我，咬我的腿。自那以后，我见狗就怕。
In my doomed starter marriage, we were at that point when most couples get a dog as a trial balloon for kids. We could only commit to goldfish. One morning I found ours flopping on the floor half-way to the window. Making a break for it, like I would a couple of years later.
我有一段注定失败的'闪婚'经历，我和前妻一度试图养狗以作为养宝宝的前奏，毕竟大多数情侣都是这么做的。但我们最终只是养了金鱼。一天早晨，我发现金鱼躺在地板上，离窗户还剩一半的距离。逃跑吧，像几年后的我一样。
What followed was two decades of dogless bliss. I met my current wife, Ilene, who, among other lovable qualities, was dogless. Then we moved from New York to Los Angeles, to a block infested with dogs and before long our 10-year-old, Kingsley, was yearning for one of his own.
之后，我过了20年没有狗的幸福生活。我遇到了现任妻子伊琳。我觉得她最可爱的一点就是不养狗。随后，我们从纽约搬到了洛杉矶一个满是狗狗的街区，不久之后，10岁的儿子金斯利就想自己养条狗了。
"Imagine me frolicking in our backyard with my own puppy!" he pleaded: "One boy, one dog, one destiny . . . ." I wanted a new kitchen floor.
"想象一下我和自家狗狗在后院开心玩闹的场景嘛！"他请求道，"一个小男孩儿、一只狗狗、一辈子……"我还想给厨房换新的地板呢，我暗自思忖道。
However, I became a dog person overnight. Far from being afraid of them, I take Laffy on doggie playdates and to a muddy city park where a random group of owners show up to throw balls.
然而，一夜之间我成了爱狗人士。我再也不怕狗了，而且还养了一只叫做"拉菲"的狗狗。我会带它去泥泞的城市公园和一群养狗人士聚在一起，陪它玩扔球的游戏。
Not random, actually. A community. That I was now a part of. That made me happy.
这并非随心所欲，这是一个团体。我现在就是其中的一份子，我很高兴。
In my toxic-bachelor days, my nickname was "Mr. Warmth," but I didn't realize how closed off I still was, even as a happily-married family guy. Like, I used to talk to my neighbors when and if I had to. Now I stop them in the street - if they're holding a leash. Because Laffy wants to be pals with everyone.
在往事不堪回首的单身岁月中，我的外号是"暖男"，但我并没有意识到我的封闭程度，甚至在结婚之后（幸福美满），我都没有意识到这一点。比如，我只有在必要的时候才会和邻居聊聊天。现在，如果我在街道上看到他们拿着狗绳，我就会走过去和他们闲聊几句。因为拉菲喜欢和所有人交朋友！
When he let me into his big heart, he got me to open up mine. Ilene said, "It took a dog to make you human." As usual, she's right. Would it be crazy to get two?
狗狗让我'住'进了它的内心，它让我变得更为开放。伊琳说："狗狗让你更有人情味儿了。"如往常一样，她说对了。现在我还想再养一只，是不是太疯狂了？
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