可可电台，每期节目一话题，让英语磨练耳朵的同时学到更多有益的小知识，丰富知识的同时受益于生活。

Rules to Follow When Lending Money to Friends andFamily

借钱给家人和朋友的法则

Only Say Yes if You Mean It

想借再借

If you feel guilt-tripped into making the loan bythe asker （"I'm desperate！"）or you question your own hesitation （"I must be a bad person or I wouldn't feel conflicted"）, then turn her down, says Levine.

莱文表示，如果你因为愧疚才借款给请求者（“我走投无路了！”）或质疑自己的犹豫不决（“我一定是个坏人，否则我就不会这么矛盾了”），那么就选择拒绝。

If you do cough up the cash when you aren't sure youwant to, you risk feeling resentful, and that can cripple the relationshipbefore it's even time for her to repay you. Not going through with the loan doesn't make you selfish or a bad friend; the response may actually protectyour bond, she adds.

如果你在不确定是否想要借钱时勉强借钱给对方，那么你很可能会感到愤懑不满，这种感觉甚至会在借款人还款前就摧毁你们间的友谊。莱文补充道，不借钱不意味着你很自私或是一个不合格的朋友，正确的回应才能真正维护你们间的感情。

Levine suggests graciously declining with a sentimentlike, "I'd really like to help, but I don't have the extra money to loan rightnow. If you feel like you need to explain further, mention an unexpectedexpense you were recently hit with, such as higher health insurance premiums,or something you have to save for, like your kids' college education.

莱文建议，婉拒对方时需带着一种情感，比如“我真的很想帮助你，但现在手头上没有多余的闲钱。”如果你觉得有必要再做进一步解释，那么可以提一些近期碰上的意外开销，比如高额保险费，或像孩子的大学费用这类需要存钱的花费。

Offering to help brainstorm other sources for theloan or ways to bring down her debt （if that's the situation）can be a thoughtful nextmove. A true friend or relative will be willing to accept no and then thank youfor any additional help. If she doesn’t, better thatyour relationship sours before you've forked over any funds.

下一步体贴的做法是，帮助借款者找寻其他借款来源或想办法减轻其债务（如果这是其面临的处境）。真正的朋友或亲人会接受你的拒绝并感谢你提供的任何额外帮助。如果对方不这么做，那么这段友情还是在你提供任何资金前先破裂为妙。

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