38 Losing Control
失控
I love to coddle babies.
我喜欢悉心照料宝宝,
I have a little one of my own.
我自己就有个小宝贝。
That's why I was protesting against the opening of an abortion clinic in our neighborhood.
所以,我非常反对在附近开一家专门堕胎的诊所。
I still recollect how we clustered in front of the clinic and tried to clog the front entrance.
我还记得我们聚集在诊所门口、试图堵住诊所正门的场面。
We would march in a clockwise movement practically all day.
我们几乎一整天都在诊所前以顺时针方向徘徊。
We would clutter the place with brochures and baby pictures that we had clipped.
我们拿着一些宣传册和我们剪辑的宝宝照片把那里弄得一团糟。
It was a rather coarse and clumsy way to get our message across.
这确实是传达我们信息的一种粗劣笨拙的方法。I also remember how we tried to form a coalition in the legislature to enact a code of laws that would limit abortions.
我们曾力图在立法机关里形成一个联盟。
We made a lot of cogent arguments.
我们提出许多有说服力的论点,
We tried to coax legislators into voting our way.
并试图以巧言诱哄立法委员会为我们投赞成票。
Although several proposed laws were accepted for consideration, none were passed or codified.
尽管有几个法律议案被接受并予以考虑,没有一个议案被通过或形成法律条文。
Eventually, our group began to coalesce with other anti-abortion groups.
后来,我们的组织开始联合其他反堕胎组织,
The coalescence gave us a stronger voice, but we also lost an element of control over the group's activities.
这一联合使我们的呼声更具威力,但组织活动还缺少些许控制。
I never believed in using violence to achieve our cause.
我从不相信使用暴力能实现我们的目标。
However, somebody in out group did and I'll never forget that day.
但我们组织中有人相信,我永远忘不了那一天。
He shot and killed a clinical psychologist who was entering the abortion clinic.
他开枪打死了一位正往诊所里走的临床心理医生。
It was a cognitive act of brutality and it happened right in front of my eyes.
我认为这是极其残忍的行为,而这一暴行就发生在我眼前。
I quickly ran to give aid to the wounded psychologist.
我忙跑过去帮助那位受伤的心理医生。
She grabbed my arm to hold herself up, but her clutch loosened as she lost consciousness.
她抓住我的手臂想站起来,但她紧握的手松开了,她已不省人事。
Since then, I've never taken part in any protest activities.
此后,我再也没参加任何抗议活动。
Why can't people with opposing opinions peacefully coexist in the same environment?
为什么意见相左的人就不能在同一屋檐下和平共处呢?