Bathtub Battleships from Ivorydale

American mothers have long believed that when it comes to washing out the mouths of naughty children, nothing beats Ivory Soap (a registered trademark of the Proctor & Gamble Company). This is because its reputation for being safe, mild, and pure is as solid and spotless as the marble of the Lincoln Memorial. It doesn't even taste all that bad. And should you drop it into a tubful of cloudy, child-colored water, not to worry - it floats.

Ivory Soap is an American institution, about as widely recognized as the Washington Monument and far more well respected than Congress. It had already attained this noble status when Theodore Roosevelt was still a rough-riding cowboy in North Dakota. Introduced in 1879 as an inexpensive white soap intended to rival the quality of imported soaps, it was mass marketed by means of one of the first nationwide advertising campaigns. People were told that Ivory was "so pure that it floats," and the notion took hold. As a result, at least half a dozen generations of Americans have gotten themselves clean with Ivory.

So many hands, faces, and baby bottoms have been washed with Ivory that their numbers beat the imagination. Not even Proctor & Gamble knows how many billions of bars of Ivory have been sold. The company keeps a precise count, however, of the billions of dollars it earns. Annual sales of Ivory Soap, Ivory Snow, Crest toothpaste, Folger's coffee, and the hundreds of other products now marketed under the Proctor & Gamble umbrella exceed thirty billion dollars.

The company has grown a bit since it was founded in 1837 in Cincinnati, Ohio, by a pair of immigrants named William Proctor and James Gamble, each of whom pledged $3,596.47 to the enterprise. For decades Proctor & Gamble manufactured candles and soap in relatively modest quantities. It took more than twenty years for sales to top one million dollars, which they did shortly before the Civil War . The company's big break came with the introduction of its floating soap and the realization that an elaborate advertising campaign could turn a simple, though high-quality, product into a phenomenon. The soap's brand name was lifted from "out of ivory palaces," a phrase found in the Bible. So successful was this new product and the marketing effort that placed it in the hands of nearly every American that the company soon built an enormous new factory in a place called Ivorydale.

Proctor & Gamble never forgot the advertising lessons it learned with Ivory. For instance, it was among the first manufacturers to use radio to reach consumers nationwide. In 1933 Proctor & Gamble's Oxydol soap powder sponsored a radio serial called Ma Perkins, and daytime dramas were forever after known as "soap operas." Over the years the company added dozens of new product lines such as Prell shampoo, Duncan Hines cake mixes, and the ever-present Tide, "new and improved" many a time. To this day, however, Ivory Soap remains a Proctor & Gamble backbone product.

Ivory remains a favorite among consumers, too, and no wonder. With a bar of Ivory Soap in your hand, you are holding a chunk of American history. If you like, you can even wash your hands and face with it and be assured that it is "ninety-nine and forty-four-one-hundredths percent pure." And it floats.

The latter quality of Ivory Soap is especially attractive to children. Generations of little boys armed with toothpicks, miniature flags, or leftover parts from model ships - there are always a few - have converted bars of Ivory Soap into bathtub battleships. A note of warning for any small boys who may be reading this: Mothers tend to frown on the practice.