Of Marriage and Single Life

Francis Bacon

HE THAT hath wife and children hath given hostages to fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue or mischief. Certainly the best works, and of greatest merit for the public, have proceeded from the unmarried or childless men; which both in affection and means, have married and endowed the public. Yet it were great reason that those that have children, should have greatest care of future times; unto which they know they must transmit their dearest pledges. Some there are, who though they lead a single life, yet their thoughts do end with themselves, and account future times impertinences. Nay, there are some other, that account wife and children, but as bills of charges. Nay more, there are some foolish rich covetous men, that take a pride, in having no children, because they may be thought so much the richer. For perhaps they have heard some talk, Such an one is a great rich man, and another except to it, Yea, but he hath a great charge of children; as if it were an abatement to his riches. But the most ordinary cause of a single life, is liberty, especially in certain self-pleasing and humorous minds, which are so sensible of every restraint, as they will go near to think their girdles and garters, to be bonds and shackles. Unmarried men are best friends, best masters, best servants; but not always best subjects; for they are light to run away; and almost all fugitives, are of that condition. A single life doth well with churchmen; for charity will hardly water the ground, where it must first fill a pool. It is indifferent for judges and magistrates; for if they be facile and corrupt, you shall have a servant, five times worse than a wife. For soldiers, I find the generals commonly in their hortatives, put men in mind of their wives and children; and I think the despising of marriage amongst the Turks, maketh the vulgar soldier more base. Certainly wife and children are a kind of disccipline of humanity; and single men, though they may be many times more charitable, because their means are less exhaust, yet, on the other side, they are more cruel and hardhearted (good to make severe inquisitors), because their tenderness is not so oft called upon. Grave natures, led by custom, and therefore constant, are commonly loving husbands, as was said of Ulysses, vetulam suam praetulit immortalitati. Chaste women are often proud and froward, as presuming upon the merit of their chastity. It is one of the best bonds, both of chastity and obedience, in the wife, if she think her husband wise; which she will never do, if she find him jealous. Wives are young men"s mistresses; companions for middle age; and old men"s nurses. So as a man may have a quarrel to marry, when he will. But yet he was reputed one of the wise men, that made answer to the question, when a man should marry, - A young man not yet, an elder man not at all. It is often seen that bad husbands, have very good wives; whether it be, that it raiseth the price of their husband"s kindness, when it comes; or that the wives take a pride in their patience. But this never fails, if the bad husbands were of their own choosing, against their friends" consent; for then they will be sure to make good their own folly.

论论结婚与独身

王佐良 译

夫人之有妻儿也不啻已向命运典质，从此难成大事，无论善恶。兴大业，立大功，往往系未婚无儿者所为，彼辈似已与公众结亲，故爱情产业并以付之。按理而论，有子女者应对未来岁月最为关切，因已将至亲骨肉托付之矣。独身者往往思虑仅及己身，以为未来与己无关。有人则视妻儿为负债。更有贪而愚者，以无儿女为荣，以为如此更可夸其富足。此辈或曾闻人议论，一云此人为大富，另一则云否也，其人有多子负担，其财必损。然独身之原因，最常见者为喜自由，尤其自娱任性之人不耐任何束缚，身上褡带亦视为桎梏。未婚者为最好之友、最好之主、最好之仆，然非最好之臣，因其身轻易遁也，故亡命徒几全未婚。未婚适合教会中人，因如先须注水于家池则无余泽以惠人矣。然对法官行政官等则无足轻重，彼辈如收礼贪财，劣仆之害五倍于妻。至于士兵，余尝见将军以渠等妻儿所望激励之，而土耳其人鄙视婚姻，故其士兵更为卑劣。妻儿对人确为一种锻炼。单身者本可心慈过人，因其资财少耗也，实则由于不常触其心肠，反而更为严酷(因而适为审判异端之官)。庄重之人守规不渝，为夫常能爱妻，是故人云优利息斯“爱老妻胜过不朽也”。贞节之妇自恃节操，不免骄纵。欲使妻子守贞从夫，夫须有智；如妻疑夫猜忌，则断难听命矣。妻子者，青年之情妇，中年之伴侣，老年之护士也，故如决心结婚，须善择时。昔有智者答人问何时可婚，曾云：“青年未到时，老年不必矣。”常见恶夫有良妻，是否由于此辈丈夫偶尔和善，更见其可贵，抑或此类妻子以忍耐为美德欤？可确言者，如妻子不顾友朋劝告而自择恶夫，则必尽力弥补前失。