手机APP下载

您现在的位置: 首页 > 雅思 > 雅思机经 > 雅思写作机经 > 正文

2015年3月21日雅思写作解析及语料库(新东方版)

来源:新东方 编辑:Aimee   可可英语APP下载 |  可可官方微信:ikekenet

  反方立场:
  有些人对于我的立场是怀疑的,有人认为明星效应对在提升援助组织的影响力方面意义是有限的。
  第一,明星毕竟是个人的力量,他们的宣传和援助对于一些国际性问题的解决是杯水车薪。例如贫困人口和环境污染问题。
  第二,名人效应是一把双刃刀。例如,有些明星为禁毒组织做宣传,号召人们远离毒品,但是,他们却没有履行对于公益组织的责任,他们本身吸毒或者犯罪,引发的是公众对于慈善组织的怀疑。
  点评:他人的立场展开反方意见。
  原创范文赏析:
  首段:背景介绍 + 争议焦点+作家立场
  A charity organization usually assume much of the responsibility for aiding the needy, providing health care, and taking care of the victims of natural disasters and so on. However,whether the assistance from the celebrities has a inspiring role to play has ignited public debate. Personally speaking, the charitable giving from social elites can benefit the need, charitable institution and themselves.
  解析:assume much of the responsibility v更多地承担责任
  解析: However,whether …… has ignited public debate 然而,是否……引起了人们的争议
  解析:charitable institution = a charity organization n 慈善组织
  解析:help = assistance n帮助
  点评:淡化模板;个性开篇;主题明确
  二段: 正方观点的展开:明星支持慈善组织的利好:
  First,as the attention-getting group,famous people should and could pass on active influence,for the speeches and behaviors of those top stars could set a fine learning example. For example, those nations suffering from the lack of medical care or insufficient financial support can, to a large extent, gain benefits from the generous donation from the celebrities if some natural disasters occur around the world. The warm-hearted helps deriving from generous business leaders or super stars can,in most cases,help those unfortunate countries to recover from the adversity. Also,since the support and concern from the influential figure could generate media awareness,those charities can become the beneficiaries too. The reputation and credibility of charitable institution can be greatly enhanced under the subtle impact of top stars. Last,celebrities,as a respectable group,usually live under spotlight, receive maximum praises and comfortable economic reward,hence,they are expected to make their unique contribution to the community as a returned favor. Their selfless donation could fulfill their social responsibilities, embody their kindnesses, and bring them great sense of satisfaction.
  解析:personages = top stars = celebrities n 明星
  拓展:famous people = influential figure = those who enjoy tremendous popularity n名人
  解析:should and could pass on active influence 应该也可以传递正能量
  解析:set a fine learning example v起到标杆作用
  解析:hence = therefore = in this sense 因此
  解析:as a returned favor 作为回报
  解析:can become beneficiaries too 也可以成为受益者
  点评:淡化模板;逻辑清晰;论证有力;细节展开;句法多变;词汇精准。
  感悟:看花容易绣花难。功夫在诗外;积累在点滴。
  三段:反方意见的展开:他人口吻;二点理由
  Notwithstanding all that,some people might remain suspicious of my stand. For a start, some people argue that stars’ assistance is limited and thus less significant in terms of resolving some international problems such as helping the population of poverty-stricken countries shake off poverty or tackling global environmental contamination. Another argument hold by some people is that the impact of celebrities might be a double-edged weapon. By that they mean, if some stars fail to practice what they preach, then, the public might lose confidence in the organizations they publicized. Some anti-drug stars ended up becoming drug addicts might be a good example.
  解析:Notwithstanding all that 虽然如此
  解析:remain suspicious of my stand 对于我的立场保持怀疑
  解析:and thus 因此
  解析:helping the population of poverty-stricken countries shake off poverty v 帮助贫困国家人口摆脱贫困
  解析:tackling global environmental contamination v解决全球环境污染问题
  解析:Another argument hold by some people is that 很多人也许认为……
  拓展:still,some people might believe that 此外,还有人认为
  解析:end up doing sth 最终以……为结局
  点评:反方意见,他人口吻;论据为二;侧重清晰;作家文采;文风顺畅。
  尾段: 再次亮明观点 + (总结理由)
  In a nutshell,I re-affirm my conviction that no matter how trivial a star’s role can be,all famous people should do their utmost to fulfill their social obligations,to do some public service activities for those charity organizations can be an effective way to serve this purpose.
  解析:In a nutshell,I re-affirm my conviction that ……总之,我重申我的立场
  解析:no matter how trivial a star’s role can be 无论明星的作为多么渺小
  解析:do their utmost to do 尽力做……
  解析:to do some public service activities = to join in some public-interest activities 做一些公益活动
  拓展:take up = embark on = undertake v做……
  解析:can be an effective way to serve this purpose. 是一个有效的方式实现这个目标
  点评:首尾呼应;表达精彩;浅显易懂。
  全文点评:原创范文只是雅思写作之一种,文无定法。本文个性开篇;主题明确;细节展开;词汇变化;衔接顺畅;逻辑客观;例证鲜明;首尾呼应;浅显易懂,可为童鞋赏析学习之佳作。


发布评论我来说2句

    最新文章

    可可英语官方微信(微信号:ikekenet)

    每天向大家推送短小精悍的英语学习资料.

    添加方式1.扫描上方可可官方微信二维码。
    添加方式2.搜索微信号ikekenet添加即可。