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When I first discovered that my mother had a younger sister, I reacted as if I’d been told about the existence of a new planet. [qh]
当我第一次发现母亲有一个妹妹时，我的反应就如同有人告诉我有一颗新行星存在一样惊讶。[qh]
This fact at once astonished me and made an eerie kind of sense, suddenly explaining the gravitational force that had invisibly arranged my family’s movements and behaviors for years.[qh]
这一事实立刻让我感到震惊，并产生了一种怪异的感觉，突然多年来潜移默化地安排我家人行动和行为的引力就得到了解释。[qh]
Now I understood why my grandfather spent so many hours in retirement as a volunteer at the Westchester Association for Retarded Citizens. [qh]
现在我明白了为什么祖父会在退休后花那么多时间在“威彻斯特智障公民协会”做志愿者。[qh]
Now I understood my grandmother’s annual trips to the local department store to buy Christmas presents, although we were Jewish. [qh]
现在我明白了为什么祖母每年都会前往当地的百货商店买圣诞礼物，尽管我们是犹太人。[qh]
(At the time, my aunt lived in a group home where the residents were taken to church every Sunday.)[qh]
(当时，我姨妈住在一家收养所，所里的住客每个星期天都会被带到教堂。)[qh]
I now even understood, perhaps, the flickers of melancholy I would see in my grandmother, an otherwise buoyant and intrepid personality, charming and sly and full of wit.[qh]
现在我甚至理解了在祖母身上看到的一丝忧郁，而她生性活泼、勇敢，是一个充满魅力、聪慧狡黠的人。[qh]
And my mom: Where do you start with my mom?[qh]
还有我母亲：她是从哪里开始的呢?[qh]
For almost two years, she had a sister. [qh]
近两年来，她有了一个妹妹。[qh]
Then, at the age of 6 and a half, she watched as her only sibling, almost five years younger, was spirited away.[qh]
在母亲6岁半的时候，她眼睁睁地看着她唯一的妹妹被偷偷带走了，这个妹妹比她小近5岁。[qh]
It would be 40 years before she saw her again.[qh]
40年后她才再次见到她。[qh]
Strange how seldom we think about who our parents were as people before we made their acquaintance—all the dynamics and influences that shaped them, the defining traumas and triumphs of their early lives. [qh]
奇怪的是，在我们了解父母之前，我们很少会想他们是什么样的人——所有塑造他们的动力和影响，他们早期生活中决定性的创伤和成功，我们都考虑得很少。[qh]
Yet how are we to know them, really, if we don’t? And show them compassion and understanding as they age?[qh]
然而，如果我们不考虑这些，我们又怎么能真正了解他们呢? 又怎么在他们老去时展现同情和理解呢?[qh]
I was 12 when I learned. [qh]
我12岁就了解了。[qh]
My mother and I were sitting at the kitchen table when I wondered aloud what I’d do if I ever had a disabled child. [qh]
我和母亲坐在厨房的桌子旁，我好奇地嚷嚷道，如果我有一个残疾的孩子，我会怎么做。[qh]
This provided her with an opening. Her name is Adele. She had red hair, I was told.[qh]
这为她开了个头。她的名字叫阿黛尔。母亲告诉我，她有一头红头发。[qh]
Weird: Who in our family had red hair? [qh]
奇怪：我们家谁是红头发?[qh]
(Actually, my great-grandmother, but I knew her only as a white-haired Battle-Ax dedicated in equal measure to her soap operas and cigarettes.)[qh]
(实际上，我的曾祖母是，但我只知道她是一位白发苍苍的Battle-Ax游戏爱好者，她在看肥皂剧、抽香烟上也投入了同样的精力。)[qh]
She is profoundly retarded, my mother explained. There had been no language revolution back then. [qh]
“她患有重度智力障碍，”母亲解释说。那时还没有语言革命。[qh]
This was the proper descriptor, found in textbooks and doctors’ charts.[qh]
在教科书和医生写的病历中，这是一个恰当的描述。[qh]
My mother elaborated that the bones in Adele’s head had knitted together far too early when she was a baby. [qh]
母亲详细解释说，阿黛尔还是个婴儿的时候，她脑袋里的骨头早就连在一起了。[qh]
