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Hey psych2goers first things first, we would like to give you a big thank you for all the love and support you've given us.
各位观众，首先我们想感谢大家给予的爱和支持。
If you find this video helpful, please give this video a thumbs up and share it with your friends. Now. Let's begin.
如果大家觉得本期视频有用，请给我们点赞并和朋友分享。现在进入正题。
In this journey called life, you will not only meet good friends who are always there to support you,
在生命旅程中，你不仅会遇上好朋友，他们总是在你身边支持你，
encourage you and want the best for you in your life
鼓励你并希望你生活一切顺利，
but also toxic ones along the way who only perceive you as an opportunity for their own personal gain.
但在这条路上，你也会遇上坏朋友，他们只把你当成是为个人获利的机会。
These friendships will affect you physically, mentally and emotionally.
这些友谊会对你的身体、心理和情感产生影响。
So how do we differentiate between a real friend and a toxic friend?
所以我们要如何区分好朋友和坏朋友呢？
Here are four differences between good friends and toxic friends.
以下是好朋友和坏朋友的四点区别。
1. Good friends protect you when you're vulnerable.
1. 好朋友会在你脆弱的时候保护你。
A good friend will take care of you when you need to be cared for and supported.
好朋友会在你需要关心和支持的时候照顾你。
Do you have a friend who protects you when you're at your lowest point in life?
当你处于人生最低谷的时候，你有保护你的朋友吗？
Or listens to you with empathy and provides emotional safety and reassurance when you went through a bad day?
或是在你生活不顺时，带着同理心倾听你，并为你提供情感安全和安慰？
Good friends are typically good listeners.
好朋友通常是好的倾听者。
They wouldn't mind listening to you vent for hours and genuinely care about your well-being
他们不会介意听你发泄几个小时，真正关心你的幸福
because they genuinely miss you and love your presence around them.
因为他们真的想念你，喜欢有你出现在他们身边。
Toxic friends only take, demand a lot and give little back.
坏朋友只会向你索取很多，回报却很少。
On the other hand, toxic friends look out for only themselves and measure their friendships by what they can gain from you
另一方面，坏朋友只关心自己，并根据他们从你那获取的来衡量你们的友谊。
Do you know anyone who's always calculating when it comes to helping you out even when you've helped them many times?
你认识这样的人吗？即使你帮了他们很多次，他们在帮你的时候也总是会算计。
Whenever they help you out, they always expect something in return. They might even guilt trip you when you're unable to help them.
他们帮助你的时候，总想着得到点什么回报。当你无法帮助他们的时候，他们甚至会让你感到内疚。
Truth is the decisions and actions of a toxic friend are mostly made based on fear and ego.
事实上，坏朋友的决定和行动大多是基于恐惧和自我。
2. Good friends are trustworthy and accept you for who you are.
2. 好朋友是值得信赖的，他们能够接受真实的你。
Good friends are true from the bottom of their hearts. They'll share their secrets while protecting yours.
好朋友是发自内心的。他们会分享他们的秘密，同时保护你的秘密。
Do you have a friend who confides in you because they trust you and you would do the same for them?
你有没有这样一个朋友？他们向你倾诉，因为他们信任你，而你也会为他们做同样的事情？
When you're in pain physically, mentally or emotionally, they won't back away
当你身体上、精神上或情感上痛苦时，他们不会退缩。
During times when you isolate yourself to a harmful degree, they make sure you're okay and they're there for you.
当你把自己孤立到伤害自己的程度时，他们会确保你没事，他们会在你身边。
They're the kind friends that are easygoing as they're not judgmental of who you are.
他们是很容易相处的好朋友，因为他们不会对你评头论足。
You don't have to hide your truth because they accept you for who you are.
你不必隐藏真实的自己，因为他们能够接受真实的你。
Toxic friends give praises to your face and stab you in the back. These people are known as two-faced friends.
坏朋友当面赞扬你，背后中伤你。这些人被称为两面派朋友。
They can say nice things right in front of you but behind you, it's a whole different story that could blow your mind.
他们可以在你面前说好听的话，但在背后却诋毁你。
They have a habit of gossiping behind your back without your knowledge.
他们有背着你说你闲话的习惯。
Everything they say to you is sugar-coated. They're dishonest and only say things that you want to hear.
他们对你说的每句话都是糖衣炮弹。他们不诚实，只说你想听的话。
And this becomes a problem because they won't stop you from making regretful decisions, even when they're aware of the consequences.
这就成了问题，因为他们不会阻止你做出后悔的决定，即使他们知道后果。
Toxic friends often have a weak morale. For example, even when things go wrong, they show you NOT to take ownership of your wrongdoings
坏朋友通常没有什么斗志。例如，即使事情出了差错，他们也会告诉你不要为自己的过失负责。
3. Good friends are mature and responsible.
3. 好朋友是成熟的，负责任的。
Good friends guide you on the right path. They listen earnestly to you and try to understand where you're coming from.
好朋友会引导你走上正确的道路。他们认真地听你说话，试图理解你的思路。
The conversations you have with them can be real deep.
你们之间的对话可以是真正深层次的。
To find out whether someone is a good friend ask yourself: Do they often respond when you talk to them about your problems?
要知道他是不是一个好朋友，问问你自己：当你和他们谈论你的问题时，他们经常回应吗？
Are they patient and empathetic or are they bored and indifferent? Toxic friends are reckless and immature.
他们是有耐心和同理心，还是表现出无聊和冷漠？坏朋友是鲁莽且不成熟的。
These friends recklessly involve you in situations that make you uncomfortable and regret later on,
这些朋友不顾一切地把你卷入让你感到不舒服和后悔的情况中，
such as getting drunk in an unsafe environment or putting you in situations where you need to always lie to others.
比如在不安全的环境中喝醉，或者让你总是需要对别人撒谎。
Sound familiar? If so, how do you plan to get out of this situation?
听起来很熟悉？如果是这样，你打算如何摆脱这种情况？
It's good to be aware and recognize the signs as early as possible.
尽早意识到并识别这些信号是有好处的。
If not, you'll have an even harder time trying to get out of this loophole because you're Jiminy Cricket is lost somewhere.
如果不是，你就更难从中脱身了，因为你就像小蟋蟀吉米尼一样迷失了方向。
And lastly good friends are compassionate with you and others.
最后，好朋友对你和其他人都很有同情心。
They're understanding and caring. For example, when you are stressed or struggling to cope with your mental health
他们理解你，关心你。例如，当你感到有压力或在努力应对心理健康问题时
they become supportive and follow your pace of getting better.
他们会支持你，跟随你的步伐变得更好。
This type of friend is rare to find because usually everyone else rushes you to recover as soon as possible.
这类朋友很难遇到，因为通常每个人都会催促你尽快恢复。
When sharing your success and happiness, they congratulate and celebrate with you.
当你分享你的成功和快乐时，他们会祝贺你，和你一起庆祝。
When you're grieving about a loss, they'll be there for you.
当你因失去亲人而痛苦时，他们会在你身边。
Good friends do only defend your name when you're not around but also encourage others of your good qualities
好朋友会在你不在场的时候为你的名誉辩护，而且还会鼓励别人赞扬你的好品质
Toxic friends give you false hope and impressions. They talk the talk, but don't walk the walk. In other words, they often make promises they can't keep.
坏朋友给你虚假的希望和印象。他们只说不做。换句话说，他们经常做出无法兑现的承诺。
Have you ever met someone who always boasts about their past good deeds or achievements?
你有没有遇到过这样的人，他总是吹嘘自己过去的善行或成就？
If yes, don't take her for granted even if they add in between apologies for seeming braggy.
如果是的，不要把这当理所当然，即便他们道歉的间隙还会为自己的自大道歉。
To spot a toxic friend like this, try asking for a similar favor or a promise they made in the past and see how they respond.
要发现像这样的坏朋友，试着请他们帮个忙或是要他们兑现以前的承诺，看看他们作何反应。
Do they back out on you by giving excuses? Or do they follow through with what they initially preached?
他们会找借口背弃你吗？还是说到做到？
Do any of these points mentioned above remind you of anyone?
上面提到的这些要点有没有让你想起什么人？
Do you have more good friends or toxic friends in your life, or do you identify with being a good friend or a toxic friend?
在你的生活中，你有更多的好朋友还是坏朋友，或者你认为自己是一个好朋友还是一个坏朋友？
Remember, no one is perfect. What matters is we learn and we become a better version of ourselves.
记住，人无完人。重要的是我们学会如何成为更好的自己。
If you have a friend who is affecting your life in a negative way, what do you plan to do next?
如果你有一个朋友对你的生活产生了消极的影响，你下一步打算做什么？
Let us know in the comments below. Share this video with someone who might benefit from it
请在下方评论告知。请和需要的人分享本期视频，
and don't forget to like this video and subscribe to Psych 2go for more psychology content. As always, thanks for watching.
不要忘记给我们点赞，并订阅我们的频道以获取更多心理学知识。一如既往，感谢收看。
