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Our families lived more than 450 miles away, so a few weeks before Thanksgiving one year,
我们的家人居住在450英里之外，所以有一年感恩节之前的几周，
my then husband and I decided to invite a guest over for the holiday.
我当时的丈夫和我决定邀请一位客人共度感恩节。
I called a senior center in the Dallas area and they suggested Ilse, a woman I imagined would be quiet, soft-spoken, serene.
我向达拉斯区域的一个老年公寓打了电话，他们推荐了伊尔丝。在我想象中她是一个安静的，温和的平静的女人。
I was wrong. Ilse was a stubborn 78-year-old force of nature.
我错了。伊尔丝是一位顽固的有自然之力的78岁老太。
She enjoyed complimentary gambling junkets to Las Vegas and kept a local bookie on speed dial.
她喜欢到拉斯维加斯免费赌博，并且是当地的一个快速拨号的赌徒。
She favored sequined T-shirts; her tiny wirehaired mutt, named Speckles; and spending time at the senior center.
她喜欢有亮片的t恤；她的小硬毛狗叫斯帕克斯；在老年公寓度过时光。
Describing this opinionated, four-foot-four woman as a fire-cracker would be like referring to the Olympic torch as a disposable lighter.
把这位固执己见、身高4英尺4英寸的妇女比作炮仗，就像把奥运火炬比作一次性打火机一样。
On Thanksgiving, within minutes of arriving, Ilse plopped her oversize purse on the kitchen counter and,
感恩节这天，伊尔丝到了我家几分钟之内，就把她的大号手包扑通扔在厨房柜台上。
with a wide, denture-filled smile, welcomed the glass of wine my husband offered.
满口假牙的她大笑着接了我丈夫端的一杯酒。
By the end of the evening, we felt as if this quirky septuagenarian were an old friend.
晚上结束时，我们感觉这个古怪的七旬老人好像是一个老朋友。
Two weeks later, I invited her to lunch. The more time I spent with Ilse, the more she became like a surrogate grandma, albeit a saucy one.
两周后，我邀请她吃午餐。我和伊尔丝相处的时间越久，她就越像我的代理祖母，虽然有些粗鲁。
She wasn't afraid to share her opinion with others or to ask me when I was finally going to have children. "You're not getting any younger," she'd say.
她不害怕和他人分享她的观点，或者问我什么时候才要孩子。她说，“你没有在变年轻。”
I soon became her personal Uber driver (minus the fee), and I noticed that the more favors I agreed to do, the more she asked of me.
很快，我就成了她的私人优步司机（不收费），我发现，我帮的忙越多，她问的就越多。
Six months after we met, desperate for backup, I called her only child, Ralph. He claimed he didn't have time to help.
相遇六个月时，我急需后援，我给他唯一的孩子拉尔夫打了电话。他表示自己没时间帮忙。
I questioned his "I'm too busy" excuse, but I kept my thoughts to myself. A few months later, Ralph passed away.
我质疑了他的“我太忙”的借口，但是我把想法放在了心里。几个月后，拉尔夫去世了。
After the funeral, I realized Ilse was too distraught to be left alone and helped her hire a caregiver.
葬礼后，我意识到伊尔丝太心烦意乱，不能让她一个人呆着，于是帮她雇了一个看护着。
Having known her for two years, I felt responsible for her. She was like family to me, and I was the only one left in her tribe.
认识她已经两年了，我感觉我对她有责任。她就像是我的家人，而我是她的家人里唯一剩下的一个。
Each time I stopped by her apartment, Ilse seemed more disconnected than the time before.
每次我去她公寓看望她时，伊尔丝都似乎比之前更加孤僻了。
Late one afternoon, she called from the emergency room to tell me she had tripped over her monstrous coffee table.
一天下午晚些时候，她从急救室打来电话，告诉我她被她那怪怪的咖啡桌绊倒了。
Using the spare key she'd insisted I make months before, I searched her apartment for other trip hazards.
我用她几个月前坚持要我做的备用钥匙，在她的公寓里查找其他的危险隐患。
