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Well, you guys, it's currently Comic-Con in New York City.
朋友们，纽约目前迎来了圣迭戈国际动漫展。
So if you see 13 guys in the subway dressed as Spider-Man, I guess it's bad?
如果你在地铁看到13个人身穿蜘蛛侠服装，那看起来很糟吗？
Yeah, it's almost the weekend. And if you think you need a break, imagine how Trump's iPhone feels.
没错，马上周末了，如果你需要休息，想象一下小特苹果手机的感受。
This is very exciting. Joaquin Phoenix is my guest tonight, and his new film. Joker is out today.
这个很让人激动，杰昆·菲尼克斯是今晚的嘉宾，还有他的新电影，《小丑》今天上映。
We see the origins of how a man went completely insane.
我们终于知道这个男的是如何变疯的了。
I guess it all started when he made a phone call to Ukraine and asked for help. That's what I...No spoilers.
我猜这都起源于他给乌克兰打电话，并寻求帮助，这是...没有剧透。
I saw that President Trump is thinking about starting his own news network to get a real voice out there.
听说小特想要开设自己的新闻频道，讲述真正的声音。
Americans are like, Finally a place to hear what Trump has to say.
美国人在说，终于有个地方可以听一听小特要说的话了。
Yup, Trump talked about starting his own news network. It will be the only channel where the shows are way louder than the commercials.
没错，小特谈论开设自己的新闻频道，唯一一档比广告还响亮的频道。
Now, this is great. Tonight the Yankees hosted the Minnesota Twins in Game 1 of the division series.
没错，这个很棒，今晚杨基队在主场迎来明尼苏达双城队，这是一场四分之一决赛。
Yankees fans are like, You suck, Twins! While Minnesota fans are like, Hey, thanks so much for having us. This is so great. Thank you.
杨基球迷说，蠢蛋双城队，明尼苏达双城的球迷说嗨，非常感谢邀请我们，这个太棒了，谢谢。
Some business news. Uber is offering a helicopter service to JFK airport.
看看商业新闻，优步向肯尼迪机场提供直升机服务。
Meanwhile, if you want to fly to Laguardia, they just send a lawn chair tied to some balloons.
同时，如果你想飞往拉瓜迪亚机场，他们只会送你一把绑着气球的草坪躺椅。
I saw that Instagram is launching a new app called Threads, where you can send photos to your closest friends.
听说Instagram推出了叫Threads的应用软件，你可以给最紧密的朋友发送照片。
It's for when you don't think the vacation photo you posted publicly made them jealous enough.
如果你上传的假期照片让他们无比嫉妒的话，那就用这个软件吧。
No, I really went there. Some business news. Bed Bath & Beyond announced they are closing some 60 locations.
不，我特别想有这样的效果，还是商业新闻，3B家居宣布他们将关闭60家店。
I knew the company was in trouble when I got a 20% off coupon in the mail to buy a Bed Bath Beyond, Yeah.
我知道该公司遇到了麻烦，因为我的邮箱中出现了一张3B家居的八折优惠券，没错。
And finally, today is National Taco Day and National Vodka Day.
最后，今天是全国玉米卷日和全国伏特加日。
And if you celebrated both, be glad it's not Monday. We have a great show.
如果你都想庆祝，很高兴今天不是周一，我们的节目很精彩。
