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However, the difference between a merit finder and, sorry, a benefit finder and a fault finder is that,
但是积极者，对不起，积极者和消极者的区别在于
the benefit finder understands that while things don't necessarily happen for the best, it is possible to make the best of things that happen.
积极者明白这世界是不会事事如愿的，但我们可以扭转坏事
Things will be OK. Things will turn out fine. It may take a while.
事情会好转的，一切会变顺利的，可能需要点时间
Until I see the benefit of it, it may take a while and I will get over the humiliation or the pain or the disappointment. But that, too, shall pass.
可能要过一段时间才能看到曙光，可能要过一段时间才能忘了羞辱痛苦失望，但一切不好的事都会过去
In other words, The benefit finder understands that these feelings are temporary,
也就是说，积极者明白这些感觉是暂时的
gives him or herself the permission to be human and then understands things will turn out fine at the end. I know that. Been there. Done that.
他会允许自己有人之常情，他会明白事情最后会好转的。我明白这点，发生的都发生了
Part of life. Permission to be human, which includes permission to experience these emotions and also the permission to fail.
这就是人生，允许自己有人之常情，包括允许自己感受这些负面情绪，允许自己失败
We'll talk a lot about this permission to fail when we talk about perfectionism. Because perfectionism is real intense for your failure or we feel it's all or nothing.
我们稍后会深入讲允许自己失败，等我们讲到完美主义时，因为完美主义对失败有强烈的情绪，如果做不到最好的，那就是最差的
Either we have a complete flawless record, or it's useless.
如果你不是完美无瑕，那你就是一无是处
It's either phenomenal, or catastrophe. All or nothing.
要么就是非凡，要么就是平庸，没有中间地带
The benefit finder understands that nature, the human nature dictates that we have painful emotions and human nature, or being human dictates we also fail.
积极者明白人的本性决定了我们会有痛苦的情绪，人的本性或者说是人就会有失败的时候
And that, too, shall pass.
但失败会过去的
