Years later, when I learned about the Heidi/Howard case study, I understood the reason why.
多年后,当我了解“霍华德/海蒂”案例后,终于明白了这是为什么。
Being at the top of the class may have made life easier for my male peers, but it would have made my life harder.
在学生中身居“高位”,也许会让那些男同学过得更轻松,但对我而言,反而会过得更艰难。
I did not reach this conclusion in a vacuum.
我得出这个结论并非空穴来风。
All through my life, culturally reinforced signals cautioned me against being branded as too smart or too successful.
从儿时起,被文化所强化的信号就警告我不要被贴上“太聪明”或“太成功”的标签,
It starts young. As a girl, you know that being smart is good in lots of ways, but it doesn't make you particularly popular or attractive to boys.
这一点在我很小的时候就深有体会。作为一个女孩,被认为很聪明尽管在很多方面都有好处,但这并不会让你在男生中变得特别受欢迎,或是变得更有吸引力。
In school, I was called the "smartest girl in the class."
在学校里,我被称为“班里最聪明的女生”。
I hated that description. Who wants to go to the prom with the smartest girl in the class?
我讨厌这样的说法,有哪个男生愿意带着班里最聪明的女生去参加毕业舞会呢?
Senior year, my class voted me "most likely to succeed," along with a boy.
高年级时,我们班投票选出我和另一个男生是“最有可能成功的人”。
I wasn't going to take any chances with the prom, so I convinced my friend, who worked on the yearbook, to remove my name.
这样一来,我便不再会有任何机会受邀参加毕业舞会,所以我强迫年鉴编辑(他也是我的朋友)把我的名字删掉了。
I got a prom date who was fun and loved sports.
这招很有用——我终于找到一位帅气、喜欢运动的舞伴。
In fact, he loved sports so much that two days before the prom, he canceled on me to go to a basketball game,
可是这位男生有点过于沉迷于运动,在舞会两天前,他为了参加一场篮球赛而取消了和我的约会,
saying, "I know you'll understand since going to the playoffs is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity."
还说:“我知道你能理解的,因为参加决赛是一辈子就一次的机会。
I did not point out that as a high school girl, I thought going to the prom was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
”当时,我没有回应说作为一个高中女生,参加毕业舞会也是一辈子就一次的机会。
Luckily, I found a new date who was less of a sports fan.
幸运的是,后来我又找到了一个对运动不那么热衷的新舞伴。