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You're from Australia, and now you live in Los Angeles. You have a 4-year-old son?
你来自澳大利亚，现在生活在洛杉矶，你有一个4岁大的儿子，对吗？
He's about to turn 5, yeah. Yeah, he's 4.
马上五岁了，对现在四岁。
He's 4 now. He's about to turn 5. Yeah, okay, good. That's how it works. That's how it...
他现在四岁，马上五岁，嗯嗯，事情都是这么发展的不是吗？ 发展...
If he was about to turn 7, you go that's a weird kid.
如果我说他转过年就7岁了，你一定觉得什么啊。
He's turning, yeah, so anyways.
他马上...没错没错。
Is he psyched for Halloween? He is psyched for Halloween. Look, I used to hate Halloween as an Australian, because we didn't celebrate Halloween.
你儿子喜欢过万圣节吗？ 他是痴迷状态，澳大利亚人讨厌过万圣节，因为我们不过万圣节。
The most experience I had with Halloween was watching, like, The Simpsons cartoons. Yeah.
我记得万圣节给我印象最深的就是看《辛普森一家》卡通片，没错。
And I always used to think ah, stupid Americans, getting dressed up.
我当时就想美国人傻帽啊，穿得花里胡哨的。
And then I went to a Halloween party like seven years ago, and I saw how all the women were dressed, I was like, Halloween's all right.
然后七年前，我参加了万圣节派对，我看到所有女性都打扮成那副模样，然后我想万圣节还是挺不错的。
I'm all right with Halloween. Not bad, yeah, I'll do Halloween. And now, every year, I do a different outfit.
真的我接受了万圣节，不错对吗，现在我每年也会穿着不同的衣服。
Like two years ago, I went as a stormtrooper. Don't do that. Uncomfortable outfit. No good.
比如说两年前，我打扮成了“帝国冲锋队”队员，别穿它的衣服，太难受了，不好。
Oh, yeah, very stiff. Yeah, very stiff. Then, I went as Oscar the Grouch,
穿起来很硬，对很硬，然后我穿了“发牢骚的奥斯卡”，
which is just Oscar the Grouch and then a big bin, like a skirt. Yeah.
你知道那个卡通人物对吗，下身是一个易拉罐，有点像裙子，对。
Beautiful outfit. Very airy. Right?
很美丽的服装，飘飘然的感觉，对吗？
But now I'm at that stage with me kid where I got to go to the pumpkin patch.
现如今，我得带着小孩去南瓜菜地。
I don't agree with the pumpkin patch. Just go to the supermarket and buy your pumpkin.
我对这个不是特别感冒，去超市买一个好了，干吗那么麻烦。
You don't have to go to a special pumpkin place.
你不需要特地去采摘一个。
Like, imagine if we did that with every other vegetable, how hard salads would be.
想象一下那不是南瓜，换成其它蔬菜，现在知道制作沙拉有多难了吧。
But people do it. People do it because it's a good color palette to take your child and get it photographed next to a pumpkin.
你知道人们为什么要这么做，那是因为色彩好看，让你的孩子和南瓜照张合影。
People like the orange next to the child. It's more for the parent.
人们喜欢孩子和橘红色在一起拍照，其实更多的是家长的想法。
It's for the parent to take a good photo.
家长可以照一些特别优美的照片。
And the good thing is, if you have a really ugly kid, it will always look good next to a pumpkin.
幸运的是，如果你的孩子长得太丑了，那么配上南瓜会让他好看一点。
Right? I'm sure, I guess so. Unless you've got, like, a really ugly kid,
对吗？ 你说得太经典了，除非你的孩子长得没有人样，
and then someone takes it as a pumpkin, and then you're...
人们把他看成了南瓜，然后就...
You are, so you don't support the pumpkin patch, no. What is this? You got a pumpkin.
所以你不喜欢南瓜菜地，不喜欢，没什么意思，你采摘南瓜。
There might be a little bit of a hayride or something. It's boring, the pumpkin patch.
然后让孩子坐坐农场里的杂草车，等等这些活动，没什么劲。
How about, like, any other Thanksgiving? I don't. I've been trying to do Thanksgiving.
感恩节呢？ 以前不会，但现在正在慢慢尝试。
My ex is Canadian, so we have an American child, so we try to all get together for Thanksgiving.
我前妻是加拿大人，所以孩子是美国人，所以我们一起过感恩节。
But we really don't know what we're doing. And so I just sort of give him some Turkey,
但是我们真的不知道要干嘛，我就会给孩子弄个烤火鸡啊，
and I'm like are you enjoying yourself, mate? There's some turkey. Give him some cranberries.
然后对他说过得开心吗？ 给你点火鸡，再给他点蔓越莓。
Are you enjoying yourself, mate? Yeah. Well, that's... I think it's stupid, Thanksgiving.
你开心吗伙计？ 我觉得感恩节没什么意思。
I'm on board with Halloween. Yeah. Think Thanksgiving is stupid.
我觉得万圣节，感恩节都没什么意思。
I don't understand the people who get very excited by it.
我不明白人们为什么对它那么兴奋。
You always meet someone who's like, dude, I love Thanksgiving, man. Thanksgiving's my favorite.
你总会遇见一些人，说我喜欢感恩节朋友，那是我最喜欢的节日。
Yeah, they know. People like.. Why?!
没错，他们绝对会这么说，为什么？
What's going on?! Every time I ask you, they go, this is what we do, man. This is what we do.
你们是怎么回事？ 每次我问他们的时候，他们都会说我们庆祝感恩节。
We get together and we eat and eat and eat and eat and eat. But I'm like how is this different from any other American day?
我们聚在一起，我们一起吃吃吃吃吃，但我想说的是，为什么那一天那么特殊，它到底有什么不同，没什么不同嘛。
And they go oh, we watch football, as well. Oh, that's a big game-changer!
他们还说我们会坐下来看球，哦天啊，也就这点不同了！
You eat and you watch football. Let's all take the day off work.
一边看球一边吃东西，那天不用上班了。
But you always get，you get things, you have cranberries, you have stuffing.
你准备了这么多东西，有蔓越莓，还有果馅。
The stuffing! The stuffing does my head in. Don't even bring stuffing up cause everyone's got, like, a grandmother or a mother,
天哪果馅，果馅才让我生气呢，千万别提果馅，所有人都在说我祖母或是我妈妈，
and they're like dude, my mother makes this stuffing, and it is literally my favorite thing in the world.
他们就这样，朋友我妈妈会给我做果馅吃，那是我吃过的最好吃的食物。
And she only makes it one day a year. And I'm like is your mother an asshole?
而且她每年只做一次，然后我想说你妈妈是疯了吗？
You just said, what? You just said it's your favorite thing in the world. Favorite thing in the world!
你刚刚还在说，这是你最喜欢的食物，最喜欢的！
Why isn't every Tuesday stuffing day?
你们干嘛不举办一个周二果馅日？
Well, no, tacos have already got the market on Tuesdays. I'll make it Wednesdays. Stuffing...Taco Tuesday.
不行，墨西哥玉米卷已经占据了周二的市场，那我们就星期三，周二玉米卷日。
Why is she holding out? Does it take a long time?
为什么她只做一次呢？ 浪费时间吗？
No, she's just being cruel. Just being cruel.
她可能就是不肯做，不肯做。
