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Well, here's what people are talking about. This is pretty big. And here in New York City, everyone is at the U.N.
这几天讨论最多的其实是这个，这件事可大了，纽约市正在召开联合国大会，所有人都来了。
I mean, that's right, the U.N. General Assembly kicked off today and I read that 193 countries will be attending.
没错，联合国大会今天隆重召开，193个国家出席。
Yep, they're all committed to one goal, making New York City traffic a total nightmare. And they're all gonna do it.
他们的目标只有一个，就是让纽约市的交通成为一场噩梦，这是他们的终极目标。
They've been really focused. They won. They did it. It is the worst.
绝对是，他们的目标实现了，他们做到了，如今的纽约交通瘫痪了。
Actually, one expert said that because of all the quick meetings, the General Assembly is like speed dating from hell.
有专家称如今的会议如疾风骤雨般迅速，所以这次大会就好比是迅速约会，真的是糟糕透顶。
Or as that's also known speed dating. I mean, when is speed dating good? When is it fun?
或者也有人叫它迅速配对，什么时候它变得这么好了，真的太有意思了！
But after meeting with officials at the U.N. today, President Trump said there's a good chance of peace in the Middle East.
会见完各方官员之后，总统先生称中东有望实现和平。
Then he was like the bad news is I accidentally started a war with Greenland.
但他随后说，坏消息是我无意间和格陵兰岛打起来了。
They say it's Greenland, but it's really snowy there so fake name.
他们说格林兰岛是一片“绿岛”，但我看那里总下雪嘛，骗人的！
That's right, Trump greeted the other world leaders at the United Nations this morning,
今天早上，特朗普在联合国会见了全球领导人，
but he needed a little help with his microphone. Check this out.
但他的麦克风可能出了点问题，来看看。
Does red, does red mean it's on or it's off? On.
红色是开还是关？开。
Another question. Where am I? Where am I? Am I somewhere? Where am I? What am I doing?
我还有个问题，我在哪？ 我现在在哪？ 我在做什么？
That other guy should have been like "uh, red means off. Say whatever you want. Go get to it." Thank you very much.!
那人应该说红色是关，你现在可以随便说，想说什么说什么，谢谢。
Tomorrow, Trump will give his first big speech to the U.N.
明天，小特将在联合国发表讲话。
His aides have been working with him for days so that he stops pronouncing it the "unh".
他的助理这几天一直帮他纠正错误，防止他在出现“unh”发音不对的问题。
It's such an honor to have my addressing the UNH. Are you related to Kim Jong? Is the red light on or does that mean off?
非常荣幸能够在“unh”（联合国）发表演讲，你和金正恩（unh）有关系吗？ 红色是关还是开？
You guys see this? Yesterday, Trump posted a tweet where he referred to Kim Jong Un as Rocket Man,
你们昨天看了吗，小特昨天又在“推特”上发帖了，给金针恩起了个外号，叫“火箭男”，
which beats the other nickname he gave him, Lil'Kim. You know what? That's just confusing. Wow. It's confusing it. That's a nickname.
舍弃了他之前的一个外号，叫作“莉儿金”，我真的有点混乱了，我都搞混了，这是个外号。
Meanwhile, I read that people in the White House are worried that other staffers might be wearing a wire for the Russia investigation. Really?
与此同时，听说白宫担心工作人员会携带窃听器，从而为俄罗斯调查提供证据，真的？
Trump assures staffers he's not wearing a wire, it's just the outline from his spanxs. Oh, okay. Nothing. It's just not...
小特说他没有带窃听器，那只是塑身衣的外形罢了，什么都没有。
Oh, I saw that today is Ben Carson's 66th birthday. Wow. Yeah, happy birthday.
今天是本·卡森66岁的生日，生日快乐伙计。
It's a little different on Ben Carson's birthday.
今年的生日有些不同。
He actually opens his eyes to make a wish. Really? Yeah. It's a little different.
他这回是睁着眼睛许的愿，与众不同吧。
Some news out of London. I read that Prince Charles may not live in Buckingham Palace when he becomes King.
伦敦方面的新闻，有消息称一旦查尔斯王子继承王位，他将不居住在白金汉宫。
Then Queen Elizabeth said when he becomes King. I love your optimism, Chucky.
伊丽莎白女王随后表示，他能等到当国王的一天吗？ 我非常喜欢你的乐观态度，亲爱的。
Let's get to some sports news here. It came out that Kevin Durant apparently uses a second twitter handle to argue with fans.
说点体育新闻吧，凯文·杜兰特被爆有“推特”小号，它用这个账号和粉丝掰吃。
Yeah, he has a secret twitter account. Then Ted Cruz said, you can do that? You go, no, you can't do that. You can do that?
没错，他有秘密账号，泰德·克鲁兹随后表示，你真能这么做吗？ 你不能这么做，你能吗？
Finally, you guys, I read that a married couple in Louisiana was arrested after filming themselves having sex in a Walmart and a Burger King.
有新闻爆在路易斯安那，一对夫妻在沃尔玛和汉堡王哈哈以后，二人被警方带走。
Of course they were very embarrassed so they told their friends it was a Target and a Wendy's.
二人十分尴尬，对朋友们称那是塔吉特百货和温蒂汉堡。
We have a great show tonight. Give it up for the Roots!
今晚的节目非常精彩，掌声送给紫根合唱团。
