You know, I didn't set out to be a parenting expert.
我从没想过做一个育儿专家。
In fact, I'm not very interested in parenting, per Se.
事实上,我本身对育儿也没什么兴趣。
It's just that there's a certain style of parenting these days that is kind of messing up kids,
只是因为当今有一种育儿方式会把孩子搞得一团糟,
impeding their chances to develop into theirselves.
阻碍他们个人特质的培养。
There's a certain style of parenting these days that's getting in the way.
这种育儿方式,正大行其道。
I guess what I'm saying is, we spend a lot of time being very concerned about parents
我想说的是,我们花了很多精力去担心父母
who aren't involved enough in the lives of their kids and their education or their upbringing, and rightly so.
没有足够参与到孩子的人生、教育以及养育过程中,这理所当然。
But at the other end of the spectrum, there's a lot of harm going on there as well,
但如果走上另一个极端,也会有很多坏处,
where parents feel a kid can't be successful unless the parent is protecting and preventing
比如家长认为,孩子自己不可能成功,除非父母可以随时保护和纠正,
at every turn and hovering over every happening, and micromanaging every moment,
关注孩子的每件小事,掌控他们的每个细节,
and steering their kid towards some small subset of colleges and careers.
引导他们进入名牌大学,找到好工作。
When we raise kids this way, and I'll say we, because Lord knows, in raising my two teenagers,
当我们这样养育孩子,我用的是“我们”,因为上帝知道,在养育我的两个十来岁孩子的时候,
I've had these tendencies myself, our kids end up leading a kind of checklisted childhood.
我自己确实也有这种倾向,让我们的孩子过一种清单式的童年。