Want Respect? Practice Humility
想得到尊重吗?那就开始练习谦卑吧。
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.—everybody wants it, but not everybody gets it.
尊荣——每个人都想拥有它,但是没有人可以得到它。
Have you ever heard an athlete complain, “I don’t get the respect I deserve”? This person is unaware that respect is not a gift; it is something you must earn. We might admire him for his skill, or envy his million-dollar salary, but we respect the athlete for the attitude he or she exhibits on the field or court, during an interview, or in daily life.
你以前是否听到过运动家这样的抱怨,“我没有得到我应有的尊荣”?这个人没有意识到尊荣不是一件礼物,只有你去争取才能得到。我们可能羡慕他的技能,或者嫉妒他百万的薪水,但是我们也尊重这个运动员的态度和在场上的表现,无论是在现场,还是在日常生活中。
What is that attitude that quickly wins respect? Humility—a modest view of one’s own importance! An attitude of humility is one of the most significant predictors of someone who is respected.
那是什么态度能迅速赢得尊重?谦卑——一个对自己很重要的谦虚的看法。一个谦卑的态度是一个人所受尊重的前提条件。
Arrogance Is the Opposite of Humility
傲慢自大与谦卑相反。
In order to adopt the habits and behavior patterns of humility, it’s important to recognize its evil nemesis—arrogance. Very few things damage one’s reputation quicker than arrogance. Here are some common phrases people use that reveal a prideful, arrogant attitude:
为了形成谦卑的习惯和行为方式,很重要的一点是要认识到它的对立面——傲慢自大。没有什么比傲慢自大能更快毁坏一个人的名声了。下面这些话通常能看出一个人傲慢自大的态度:
Geez, do I have to do everything around here?
天啊,是不是我要做的所有的事都在这里?
If I don’t toot my own horn, no one else will.
如果我不吹嘘,没有人会知道。
Let me handle it. No one can do it better than me.
让我来处理它,没有人可以比我做的更好。对
In themselves, these words may not seem so bad, but remember that arrogance is an attitude—a negative one. Individuals who say these kinds of things act in a way that sends a signal to those around them that they believe they are superior to everyone else.
他们自己来说,这些话可能没有这么坏,但是记住,傲慢的态度是消极的情绪。那些人对各种事情的行为对周围的人发出了一种信号,让他们相信他们是比任何人都优越的。
For example, arrogant people often push others aside because they believe they are the only ones qualified to get things done the right way; they speak in ways that put down or disparage others; they take every opportunity to boast about their own accomplishments; and they project an obvious air of trying hard to appear cool.
例如,骄傲自大的人总是说别人的悄悄话,因为他们相信这是他们知道一些事情的合格的好方法。他们是用贬低和蔑视他人的说话方式;他们会抓住任何时机去吹嘘他们自己的成就;他们努力去制造一种明显的冷的氛围。
Self-Confidence or Humility
自信还是谦卑
You don’t have to sacrifice self-confidence to practice humility. When we start to talk about humility, one of the primary objections of driven people is the fear of not appearing confident enough. I will assure you that adopting an attitude of humility does not require you to sacrifice your self-confidence or the confidence you project.
你没必要去通过牺牲自信来成就谦卑。当我们开始去讨论谦卑时,其中主要反对的被动的人是害怕没有足够的自信。我将向你保证,会采用一种谦逊的态度不需要你牺牲你的自信或你项目的信心。