编者按:
也许我给予大卫的某种东西,至少我从他哪里学到了很多。我懂得了时间如何使人克服看上去无法逾越的痛苦,我学会了帮助需要我帮助的人。大卫还使我明白,一个人怎样才能不通过语言而去帮助他人。所需的只是一个拥抱,一个痛哭时可以依偎的肩头,一次友好抚慰,一种同情的本性,以及一双聆听的耳朵。
David
Years ago,when I was working as a psychologist at a children's institution in England , an adolescent boy showed up in the waiting room ,It was David.
David wore a black raincoat that was buttoned all the way up to his neck. His face was pale,and he stared at his feet while wringing his hands nervously.He had lost his father as an infant,and had lived together with his mother and grandfather since. But when David turned 13,his grandfather died and his mother as killed in a car accident . He was very depressed,refusing to talk to others.
The first two times we met,David didn't say a word. He sat in the chair and only looked up at the children's drawings on the wall. As he was about to leave after the second visit,I put my hand on his shoulder.He didn't shrink back,but he didn't look at me eigher.
"Come back next week,"I hesitated a bit. Then I said,"I know it hurts."
He came,and I suggested we play a game of chess.He nodded,After that we played chess very Wednesday afternoon----in complete silence and without making any eye contact. It's not wasy to cheat in chess,but I admit that I made sure David won once or weice.
It seemed as if he enjoyed my company. But why did he never look at me ?"Perhaps he senses that I respect his suffering." I kept wondering and playing with him,until some months later, suddenly,he looked up at me ,"It's your turn," he said.
After that day ,David started talking.He got friends in school and joined a bicycle club.Hw wrote to me a few times , the letters stopped. Now he had really started to live his own life.
Maybe I gave David something.At least I learned a lot from him. I learned how time makes it possible to voercome what seems to be an insuperable pain. I learned to be there for people who need me. And David showed me how one --without any words--can reach out to another person. All it takes is a hug,a shoulder to cry on ,a friendly touch ,a sympathetic nature--and a ear that listens.